Mounted cop...

[TED]

There was a cop on his horse waiting to cross the road when a little boy on his new shiny bike stopped beside him.



''Nice bike,'' the cop said, ''did Santa bring it to you?''

''Yep,'' the little boy said, ''he sure did!''

The cop looked at the bike and while handing the boy a $20 ticket he said, ''Next year, tell Santa to put a license plate on the back of it.''

To go along with the cop, the little boy said, ''Nice horse you got there sir, did Santa bring it to you?'' ''Yes, He sure did,'' said the cop. The little boy looked up at the cop and said, ''Next year tell Santa to put the d*ck underneath the horse instead of on top.''

[OzMan]

Wow, TED, that joke's almost as old as me;)

Still funny, tho......

[TED]

Wow, TED, that joke's almost as old as me;)

Still funny, tho......


wow that old :eek::eek:

:D

[OzMan]

Guy gets pulled over on the bridge for speeding.

Cop asks him what he does.

Guy says he's an Anus Stretcher.

Cop asks "WHAT??", so the guy explains it.

He says they take anuses and stretch them out. They can be really useful when the right size. Tells the cop that it took him over a month, but he once managed to get an anus that stretched six feet across.

Cop looks at him and says "What in the hell do you do with a six foot arsehole"

Guy says "Give him a radar gun and put him at the end of the bridge.

:D

[zooworker]

Bar Cop
There was this policeman who liked to stake out bars for an easy job by watching the drunks and then arresting them. After a while, a man came out and starting walking to his car. The man could not keep his balance and fell down several times. He finally found his car after wandering the carpark for a few minutes. The man tried to open his door but couldn't insert the key properly. The policeman was thinking to himself that this dude was clearly drunk. The man put the key in the ignition and sat there in his car. He blinked a few times and then did nothing. The policeman goes up to him and pulls him out of his car. The policeman orders the man to breathe into the breathalyser. It reads 0.0. The cop is puzzled and says:"I'm sorry, but I think that this piece of shit is broken." The man replies:"I doubt it, I'm the designated decoy."

[turtletime]

Bar Cop
There was this policeman who liked to stake out bars for an easy job by watching the drunks and then arresting them. After a while, a man came out and starting walking to his car. The man could not keep his balance and fell down several times. He finally found his car after wandering the carpark for a few minutes. The man tried to open his door but couldn't insert the key properly. The policeman was thinking to himself that this dude was clearly drunk. The man put the key in the ignition and sat there in his car. He blinked a few times and then did nothing. The policeman goes up to him and pulls him out of his car. The policeman orders the man to breathe into the breathalyser. It reads 0.0. The cop is puzzled and says:"I'm sorry, but I think that this piece of shit is broken." The man replies:"I doubt it, I'm the designated decoy."

aaah, one of my favorite cop jokes! :)

[sar94pga]

aaah, one of my favorite cop jokes! :)

i am ashamed that we never thought of that back in the day.....designated decoy...thats brilliant!

[turtletime]

i am ashamed that we never thought of that back in the day.....designated decoy...thats brilliant!

i don't think i could have ever filled that role!!!!! but I sure did practice!!